Apparently, I’d said ‘fuck’ twice before 9:45am.
The soundcheck was at 7:30am. I spent the next hour lapping up the calm, focussing on what I was going to say. at 9:40am.
It was a new talk. Designed to last 20 precious minutes for an audience of about 450. With an average salary of about $54 an hour, that’s an audience cost of $8100 for those twenty minutes.
I didn’t want to waste their time.
The tension from the day before was still there, though, as people came into the room. Tension about the state of the world, and whether schools can really do anything about it.
I started making some tweaks to hone in on my message, which was on a slightly different angle of attack, on the same problem.
In short: if you focus on what you can’t control, then
a) you’ll be really unhappy; and
b) the thing you can’t control will control you even more.
I also changed the way I would deliver it. Much faster-paced than normal, as a counterpoint to the thoughtful, pregnant pauses that normally go with “challenging times” speeches.
And as the room filled up, and still the mood felt low, I would make sure of one thing: they’d laugh. Tears-rolling-down-their-faces, sore tummy, laugh. If that’s all I achieved, it would be worth the $8100 of their time, and my airfare over.
I set off, with some strategically sewn West-of-Scotland swearies, on three big ideas:
Radical transparency makes the difference between a manager and a leader. Managers follow instructions and orders. Leaders inspire a following. Radical transparency doesn’t mean you have to spill your heart every day. It means that you use Plain English - simple language - to be completely clear and specific about what you value. You should value what you value even if it creates unhappiness sometimes, when others challenge your values. Because being transparent when you change your value set with the wind isn’t being transparent at all. It’s being opaque about what matters.
Lead with strength through ambiguous times. Ambiguity has been the mainstay of the world for twenty years or more. How you deal with it is what matters. If you believe ambiguity is a sign of weak project management or a poor plan, you’re in denial about what skillset you need to survive it. In ambiguous periods you need mastery (you’ve got to know your work inside out) and ambition (a vision that retains your internal GPS regardless of today’s storm). In jazz, there isn’t a wrong note until the rest of the band ignore it and keep playing what they wanted to, as Steffon Harris (below) illustrates beautifully. They have the mastery of their instruments and of the ideas behind certain notes, and they have a vision of how they want their audience to feel.
Empower others and encourage their autonomy. The best jazz bands don’t need someone with a stick at the front. Many orchestras play beautifully even if the conductor stands back. A soloist can even take over tempo for the whole orchestra. We all have soloists in our teams. We know who they are, and they can move things even when we’re exhausted, brow-beaten or unsure of where to go next. Find your soloists, and give them the invitation to play.
These three things are incredibly powerful for getting things done, and sticking close to what you stand for, through thick and thin.
But they’re also a recipe for something else, even through thick and thin: they’re a recipe for happiness.
Wellbeing isn’t a yoga mat, a free massage, or a policy. It’s not a building in the corner of your school, nor a person behind a door with a couch.
Wellbeing and happiness are found - I think - in that crossover between doing work you feel matters, that other people might benefit from, and getting good at it. Hopefully, there’s someone willing to pay you for it. For 15 years, that’s been our quest at NoTosh.
We have worked so hard, but as long as we’re doing high quality work we feel matters, that others benefit from, and we get paid enough for it, our team will always be happy.
Happiness also comes down to something else. Maybe the greatest happiness generators we all have are the smallest of things. Do small things that make people smile.
And if you can get them shedding tears of joy, and giggling for no reason at random moments in the day from that thing you shared a week ago, so much the better.